There are two ways a man can be rich in this world. He can have a lot of money, or a lot of friends, but he cannot have both-Mr Heineken. In this world we live in, we believe we are all naked and the only way to be covered up is by the people that surrounds us. An African adage says that "Human being are my clothings, when I look around and see them around, i say to myself, Human being is my clothing" .
These words in this world we live in now are now overrated, there is no longer true friends, the only people we have as friends are people we just want to talk to so our teeth doesn't smell when being closed for long. The people you call friends are people that smiling right to your face and just want to stab you in the back the moment you walking away.
Just like marriage, a friend is like your support system, immediately you call someone your friend, they should assume the role of your support system and should be ready to have fun with you when it is fun time, and when you are down, they should cheer you up. A friend is not a baby-sitter, but sometimes all we need is our friend, they should support you physically, mentally, financially, emotionally. Some say sexually, but that is friends with benefit and that is not why we are here.
If your friends are only there when it is all rosy, they were not friends in the first place, but business contact or your party buddy, don't call them friend. What are the good experiences you have with friends? Are they something to write home about?
I have seen a friend that took away all cooking ingredients away from their housemate when she knows they could not buy anything at that time of the night and probably with less cash, and when the friends decided to use some bad ingredients just to survive, she came back to their room to mock them, these are not people you call friends, or people that are capable financially to help you when you down, but when you ask them, they have just used that money few minutes ago, and will tell you how you have always asked them money at the wrong time every time.
Sometimes you are depressed and explained to some confidant, only to hear your story from a very distant source and you wonder how they got to know.
You need to start asking who are your friends, if you don't start forming your own clique of your own taste, you will always be failing whenever you need support.
I had to blocked a friend after i had an accident and had a swollen hand, i called him to help with massaging my arms to help reduce pain, he said he was on his way to a another friend's house and will be at my place soon.
For 24 hours, no call came into my phone or mesage. I had to undergo a very harsh pain and could not sleep all through the night, my so called friend failed to call me, i later got to know he had only gone to see the other friend to get marijuana, so much for a friend.
Who are your friends? I have been disappointed by people i call my close allies and have gotten help and fun from people i never expected. I am re-evaluating, do the same.
Re-Evaluating Your Family
Back then in school, we were told a family is a group of people that are tied by blood or marriage, but if i see my teacher back then, i will tell her she had taught us a lie. You need to start re-evaluating your family members too. A lot of family members out there are just like the so called fake friends I had mentioned above.
They are only available and will respond to you only when you are around them, they will send you a text message on Easter, Christmas, Ramadan or Eld-Fitri, that is all, the next time you see them call you is another year when those events are up again. Are these your family members?
After calling a family member for more than six times, i waited for a month or two, of course, they never call me back and when I call them with the same exact number, i was surprised to hear "Who is this?" I dropped the call and deleted the phone number, guess we not cool.
A family member should be way more than a friend, they should support you physically, mentally, financially, emotionally and not only on festive periods.
Recently i found out family members like Cousin, nephew, brother-in-law and others are just not worth it. Most of them most times are lies.
To me, Family can be defined as Your father, mother and the children(You). This is 2015, the less people you keep, the better, it is better you know you don't have a support system and start building one now.
You can enjoy life with people you meet than the so called family members, so far you are nice. I have met a lot of people in life going forward that i will replace family members with them anytime any day. Start re-evaluating your family members now.
I still believe family are your immediate people, father, mother and siblings. Anything outside that is gambling. If you expect less from extended family members, you will never be disappointed in life. Your father or mother will always stand by you, no matter what, family members will deny you at any slight mess you find yourself. You are On Your Own.
Michelle Odogwu For Doy News